i think personally, this is the hardest thing for me. i love to talk, and i have times where i just vomit up words. Basically just talking without either thinking, or taking a breath in between. Usually these times i walk away from a conversation thinking, "why did i say that?"
Some of these times are funny, like the time i spilled my whole coffee on the bathroom floor at michaels craft store. And instead of telling the employee just that. i was so flustered i said "i made a huge mess in your bathroom, i'm so sorry, do you have something to clean it up. . . ." As i'm going on and on, she's staring at me with horror, until i finally realized i didn't tell her it was coffee. That poor woman, and of coarse i was so embarrassed.
And then there are the other times, which sadly happen more often. Where there are hurt feelings, or told secrets. Normally these situations take days, or years to repair. And a bit of humble pie on my part. Honestly, there are way too many for me to pick an example.
So, as christians what are we told to do in these situations? Thankfully God has much to say about this.
Ephesians 4: 29 "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen."
Luke 6:31 "Do to others as you would have them do to you."
Titus 3:1-2 "Remind people to be subject to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good, to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and always be gentle toward everyone."
Exodus 23:1 "Do not spread false reports. Do not help a guilty person by being a malicious witness."
Proverbs 20:19 "A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid anyone who talks too much."
To summarize this up. Think before you speak. Just because you heard something about your friend, if it won't build her up, don't tell her/him. Many times i have been told what people "thought" of me. Honestly i don't need to know. it only hurt my feelings. Try to remember, things get lost in translation. Someone can say something negative or cruel when they are having a bad day. it doesn't necessarily mean its true, or that they will feel that way tomorrow.
And lastly have forgiveness. Forgiveness for yourself when you mess up, (cause we all do). And forgiveness for another when they mess up, or hurt your feelings. Forgive even when you don't get an i'm sorry. Hardest thing in the world to do without Christ, but He is there to erase the hurt, mistrust,anger, and hate.
in closing i'd like to pray for you now, . . .
i pray right now that you heal hearts that are hurting. We know you can Jesus. i pray that you would help us watch our tongues, and let kindness fill us up. Help make it easier to love the unlovable. Help us see them for what they are, another person you died for, whom you love. Bless your Holy name. i pray for everyone reading this to be filled with your peace and love. Help us get excited about you, and your mercies everyday. Thank you Jesus. You are touching lives, and you let us be a part.